It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
