The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
