that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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