nut hugger
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Randomize