Whod you bang
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
