i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
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