Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
How does it feel to date your dad?
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Randomize
