Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Randomize
