She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
Randomize
