loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
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