We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
