What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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