after a month anything with tits is on the radar
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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