I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
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