I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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