Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Why did my mother make you get naked?
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
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