I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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