Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
