i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
