Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
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