Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
Randomize