um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize
