Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
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