even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
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