"it" just moved
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Randomize
