If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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