If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
Randomize