friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Randomize