if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Randomize