I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
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