I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
