Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
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