whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
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