Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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