too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
