I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Randomize
