I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
We are all done wearing pants today
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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