her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Randomize
