it wasn't lemon gatorade
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven