I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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