This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
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