She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
