O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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