how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
Randomize
