I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
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