he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
Randomize
