i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
