The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
