we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Randomize
