Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
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I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
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I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
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