yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
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